• Aby Deal

Stepping into Self Love

When I started my social media channels nearly three years ago now, I never imagined I’d be wearing a beautiful flowy dress in the greenery of a public park, someday, taking photos that made me feel like a radiant goddess. I never imagined I’d have 200,000 people following my journey, or a community of women in my local community that share my values and love for myself and body. I never imagined I would feel this good being in my own skin, instead of trying to mimic someone else's idea of what was beautiful.

It’s because of seeing representation of women who looked like me, putting themselves out there, that I now feel safe and comfortable to do the same. It’s because of the love and support from this community that I feel that I am worthy of self love and appreciation for every phase of my body love journey.

I reflect on my early 20’s and I feel for my younger self because my mind was so convinced I could only wear dresses that covered my arms, with leggings, and cardigans and that I needed to find ways to blend in. The dresses I wanted so badly to wear without a cardigan or leggings, I refused. I was so convinced I was UNWORTHY of feeling like a princess, and that I needed to spend the energy I could have spent into practicing self love trying to minimize myself to fit into whatever society's beauty standard was. I look at these photos now with genuine admiration for the women I’ve become, tears in my eyes, because I know that journey hasn’t been easy.

Self love is a never ending process…We unlock layers, and we just keep unlocking layers, healing and growing. I wake up every day knowing that even on the days I don’t feel good enough, that I will always be good enough. I still wake up and over analyze my body sometimes, or pin point an insecurity and think of ways to minimize it, but when I feel myself going there, I remind myself how far I’ve come, and repeat my affirmations.

I am beautiful, I am more then enough, I am worthy, I am strong.


Photo by: Andrea Shea Photography

Dress by: Torrid



 

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